Dear Readers,

It is time for America to wake up, and give The White House an enema.

The future of your country is in your hands, and you cannot let it slip through your fingers. It doesn't even matter who you vote for as long as you VOTE.

Worried that another election is going to be stolen? If you feel that's the case; it could very well be time to revolt.

You're never going to be #1 at anything if you continue to let your government tell you who your leaders are going to be. It's time for you to tell the government.

Still not convinced?

There's a little film that you need to watch:

"Slacker Uprising" a film by Michael Moore (2007)

Dear Readers,

Today was an interesting day.

I saw my Mother today. She gave me her address, and her phone number and she invited me in for a visit. I went in for a visit and:

The visit was fine and we had a few laughs. I talked about my new place and school, and she was happy to hear those things. She told me about her active social life and it was nice to hear and see that she was doing well. The problem came after the visit.

In the interest of total honesty, I called my sister and told her that Mom gave me her address and phone # and that I paid Mom a visit. According to Bev (my sister) my name is on a special list as someone who is not allowed in Mom's building. Keep in mind that Mom gave me the information and that she invited me in. I'm both scared and a little confused by this, and wonder what my next step should be? Mom is saying she wants me to visit her on Friday and she said she will call. There was no trepidation from her end and she was thrilled to see me. What shall I do now?

I did leave a message with the homecare office when I got home, and asked to meet with them. Once again, I wanted to be honest about seeing Mom because nothing wrong is being done, so why hide it?

I'm feeling a little dazed and confused. There's no restraining order and no specific instructions about me seeing Mom and she WANTS to see me. What on earth?!

Well I can't say that I had a boring Thanksgiving, but now I'm even more lost as to how to handle the Mom situation.

Some advice would be greatly appreciated. Moral support as well as any legal insight into this bizaare matter.

Dear Readers,

If I count back, I can count the following holidays (in 2008) that I've been completely alone:

• Valentine's Day
• Easter
• Mother's Day

Counting foward, I will be alone for the following holidays:

• Thanksgiving
• Christmas

This includes missing the first of my Mother's birthdays that I've ever missed. I've also never been without her on any of the above days.

She doesn't wish to see me, and my family doesn't see each other, so this situation isn't really going to change.

I have no money, so I can't do any kind of fun Christmas shopping or even get myself a small ham, or something for either Thanksgiving or Christmas.

I miss my Mom like crazy, but there's nothing that I can do about that. I miss being able to go Christmas shopping, but there's nothing I can do about that. I miss a lot of things, and there's nothing that I can do about any of it.

I don't want to be alone, but there's nothing that I can do about that either. All I can do is express my pain, and pray that the pain doesn't get any worse. It probably will.

I found out where my Mom lives, but because she doesn't want to see me, all I can do is walk by her place (I have no choice in my daily life) and stare sadly at her apartment building.

I don't even have the warmth of a romantic relationship.

Friends? Too far away to be able to spend time with.

No money, no friends, no family, no love.

Things have to get better ... right?

As I write this, tears are filling my eyes and how I long to hug someone.

On a more positive note (kinda):

I've started my schooling up again, with a vengance. I'm not entirely sure if I'll be able to afford to continue school after I finish the current 8 courses, but that shouldn't suprise me. NOTHING suprises me.

It's sad to think that I may have lost the ability to be shocked.

I see so much horror in the world, and try my best to do what I can to make the world a little less horrible. If only MY world was a little less horrible.

Dear Readers,

I'm gay.

I've spent too long attempting to deny this and I just can't do it anymore.

I felt like I was lying to all of you by not saying this, so I chose to do it now.

I've known this since I was kid, but living in the family I do made it impossible to come out of the closet without geting rejected. Since my family has rejected me already, then I guess there's not much else to be worried about.

I've had secret sexual relationships with several men (always safe) and I spent so much time lying to everyone about my "special visitors". I haven't got the energy for that anymore.

I'm gay.

Dear Readers,

Well it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.

Unfortuntely, it's a bigger commitment than I originally thought. The student nurse and I have to meet once a week, for 8 weeks.

I guess she's gonna be a Lowenstein.